Episode 148: Santa Has Diplomatic Immunity (w/ Santa)

We're streaming on Twitch now, we're wrong for hating Rogue One, and Santa is here to tell us that he had sex with all our moms.

Released on December 21, 2016, 4:59 am UTC

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Show Notes

Show notes by Leon - Latest version on the DCTVpedia

Cold Open

"That's called prostitution!" - Brian from a Pr0blem Solverz bit (probably from That's Prostitution!).

Twitch.tv

So way back in the old days, we streamed on a couple different sites including Justin.tv. After a while, Justin.tv created/bought/got bought by/did some business thing with Twitch.tv and Justin.tv went away. At that point they only allowed people to stream video games and we had to move on to other streaming services. Well now Twitch.tv opened up their site to non-video-game streams. So they decided to start streaming all their shows on Twitch.tv. People got a little riled up, and this whole Twitch thing really deserves its own page, but long story short: there's a lot of Chatrealmers that aren't into Twitch for a wide range of reasons.

Over the weekend, when the Twitch news came out, Justin talked on Twitter about how they would simulcast all their shows on both Twitch and the normal DCTV. But for this first show they decided to only show the Twitch chat on screen. Not a great way to ease the transition, but I guess they just wanted to get people over on Twitch. There were a bunch of peeved people over in the DCTV chat. It was a bummer.

Let's Look at Old Videos

They looked at old NSFW/BBLiveShow videos.

Patreon

The Patreon is at $1,661. If you want to become a patron, head on over to Patreon.com/NightAttack.

James Cashme II

Santa Claus is Here!

Santa is back to answer your letters!

  • Thomas - "My car died, now I have to walk in the snow. Can I have a reindeer?"
    • How about you get fucking Instacart?!
  • CptFUBAR - "Life's been shitty. Just gimme some cold hard skrilla."
    • There's so much suffering in the world, I'm not giving you shit.
  • Max - "Seeing everyone happy together gets me depressed. Do you know of any good escort services in Columbus, OH?"
    • I don't know about Columbus, but come on up to the North Pole
  • Jessica - "All I want for Christmas is an action figure of Quoth(sp?)"
    • I don't know what the fuck that is
  • Susie Snowflake - "I saw you kissing mommy!"
    • Why don't you come sit on Santa's lap?
  • Steven - Something about guitars
    • Elves don't have bones
  • "Is Ghost Dad on the Naughty or Nice list, this year?"
    • Wait a minute, forget the dead dad thing, you got cash?
  • "Would you ever consider growing out your moustache again?"
    • No
  • Karl - "I just recieved a shipping container with 1,000,000 beards, what can I do with them?"
    • That's weird and gross
  • Gambolingman - "What are you doing when you're hanging out with my mom?"
    • While you're watching movies, me and your mom are making movies
  • FriskyFrisky - "I would like to have my 1983 Mustang back in working condition"
    • That thing should've died a long time ago. I don't like the car.
  • Michael - "You broke my heart. Shame on you."
    • Oh, are you that Michael?

Who Can We Blame for the Bad Parts of Rogue One

Brian and Justin didn't like Rogue One and the internet doesn't like that they didn't like it. Instead of out and out spoiling Rogue One, they started talking about the things they didn't like about the movie by pretending to talk about The Secret Life of Pets.

Movie Draft Chat

  • Did we win the draft this summer? - Brian
  • Uhhhhh. Yeah? Yeah. - Justin
  • Was that this summer? - Brian
  • I wouldn't be surprised if Arrival gets an Oscar bump - Brian
  • The word on Logan is very positive - Justin

Diamond Time

If you want to submit your thing for Diamond Time head over to the weekly Diamond Time post on the DiamondClub subreddit. Instructions on how to format your submission can be found in the post!

Great Quotes

  • "Send me things for a change" - Santa

Fun Facts

  • This was the first Night Attack streamed on Twitch.tv

Characters

  • Ted Twitch - During the Twitch segment

Preshow Doc

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