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Episode 135: Prison Logic Attack (w/ Romany Malco)

We welcome back Romany Malco into the warm embrace of the Diamond Club as we talk about his campaign to make a Tijuana Jackson movie. Then another old friend makes a surprise appearance for the SECOND HOUR of the show.

Released on September 21, 2016, 4:40 am UTC

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Show Notes

Show notes by Leon - Latest version on the DCTVpedia

Cold Open

GEOCITIES.COM/INFOWARS!

Wasn't Last Week Great?

Remember last week when Adam Curry was here? That was great. And remember how Adam totally smoked three joints during the show? That was cool. The guys talked to Bonnie about how the whole pot smoking thing was kinda sprung on her. She wasn't totally thrilled about the studio smelling like pot.

Is Brian an Asshole?

Brian went on Twitter to talk politics and was an asshole to this one dude.

Fuck Your Motherfucking Peanuts

Bonnie took the kids to Sonic the other day and she ordered three slushes and she was waiting for like 10 minutes and they still hadn't gotten their drinks. She pressed the button again to get an update on their drinks, but the dude just said they were on their way. While they were waiting, Bonnie was talking all sorts of shit about how unhealthy the Sonic menu is. Realizing that she was shit talking the establishment that is serving her and her kids, she hypothesized that maybe the employees were listening in on their conversation and are holding their drinks hostage. At this point she and Penny started saying nice things about their food in hopes of getting their food.

After a while, a very cheerful employee comes out with their food and some of the stuff wasn't what they ordered. They ordered an orange slushie, but they got an orange creamsicle. That's not a HUGE deal, except Sonic's ice cream has trace amounts of peanuts in them and Penny has a SEVERE peanut allergy. The server was all "Nah, dog, it's totally cool." and Bonnie was like "Nah, I'm good. It'll literally kill my daughter."

At the point where Brian and Justin started goading Bonnie for another MC Allergy track, Romany Malco called into the show.

Romany Malco is Here!

Holy shit! It's Romany Malco, he was in movies and shit! He talked a bit about what he's been up to living in Puerto Rico and his philosophy about Hollywood.

Patreon

The Patreon is at $1,519. If you want to become a patron, head on over to Patreon.com/NightAttack.

Tijuana Jackson

Romany is friends (in the Disney castmember sense) with a ex-convict turned life coach named Tijuana Jackson, who previously appeared on the NSFW episode "The Science of Triumph". Right now Romany is trying to get a Tijuana Jackson movie made. Hit up his Indiegogo campaign for the Prison Logic: Mockumentary.

The guys talked a lot about the origins of the Tijuana Jackson character and how he was inspired both by the movie American Pimp and also Romany growing up as a black kid in Texas.

Toward the end of the episode, Romany mentioned that the Prison Logic movie will be similar to "American Movie" a documentary about a couple Wisconsin dudes trying to make a horror movie. Apparently it's crazy funny, Romany loves it.

OhDoctah!

Oh, shit! OhDoctah is in the chat! Woah! He knows Romany! Hey! OhDoctah's on the show now too!

Diamond Time

If you want to submit your thing for Diamond Time head over to the weekly Diamond Time post on the DiamondClub subreddit. Instructions on how to format your submission can be found in the post!

Hey Guys! Scientology!

So at the end of Diamond Time, Brian googled "Kratom" and the first result was Narconon which is a Scientology thing!

 

 

That's all.

Extra Special <> Perk

Romany set up a special Indigogo perk for Diamond Clubbers for $17.76 $18 where you (YOU!) can get your name in the credits of the movie. Use the secret link bit.ly/prisondiamond and submit your pledge. There's only 50 spots available at that level. So hurry up and get your name in the credits! For just $18! Do that shit!

Uh, bad news bro, by the time the episode ended, 31/50 of the <> slots were claimed. If you're reading this, if there's any left at all, it's probably VERY limited quantites.

Unicorn Sex w/ Nina Hartley

OhDoctah recently did an interview with porn star Nina Hartley. Fun fact: she was bottomless for the whole thing. Watch that shit!

Aftershow

We talked to Romany a bit more about the production of the movie and Justin yelled at some people in the Chatrealmwho questioned his knowledge of south Florida geography.

OH FUCK! I'M HAVING A SEIZURE! Oh jk, one of the production computers just crashed. That's it everyone! Go home!

Belt Winner

Lol

Great Quotes

Fun Facts

  • This was a LONG episode! There's only been three other 2+ hour Night Attacks before (Group TherapyGushing Warmth and Pig Bladders' Eve).
    • But Group Therapy doesn't really count because that one included the preshow and aftershow.
  • Since I'm writing this before the official release, I don't know the actual runtime, but I clocked it at somewhere around 123 minutes, which would put it at either #2 or #3 in terms of longest episodes

Characters

  • Alex Jones (Briefly)
  • Tijuana Jackson (occasionally, little bits at a time)

Preshow Doc