Episode 146: It Was a Graveyard Splash

Justin doesn't respect dead people, but he does know how to take out the trash, Brian is riding high on his accurate predictions from last episode and OH MY GOD IS ALEX JONES A SECRET DJ?

Released on December 7, 2016, 5:14 am UTC


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Show Notes

Show notes by Leon - Latest version on the DCTVpedia


More Flaming Shot Game!

Cold Open

How do you make the perfect Vine?

Lana Janko

The guys mentioned Lana Janko in the early parts of this episode. We don't actually know who Lana Janko is, but way back in 2012 before an NSFW episode Justin started getting texts from weird numbers asking why he's been harassing Lana Janko.

Justin Peed on a Headstone

After a night of drinking, Justin's friends got in a fight and he was left to walk home on his own. Not knowing exactly how to get home, Justin found himself walking through a cemetery. Bad news bro, he had to pee. He wasn't going to make it out of the cemetery without peeing so he figured "Fuck it, might as well go all the way and pee on a headstone!" Years later, he was asked to speak at the wedding of those same two friends. Justin wrote a speech that included that story of Justin disrespecting a grave and ended with the line "May their love last as long as the trace elements of my urine on that headstone". Luckily, Justin had a friend read over the speech and convinced him to leave that part out.

When Are You Done Taking the Trash Out?

A while back, Bonnie tweeted a poll about what constitutes "taking out the trash". Brian will occasionally take out the trash but not replace the bag. Similarly, Ashley will do the same thing in the Jurymore household.

Good Fortune is Raining from the Sky

Last week Brian was being showered with thousands of new YouTube subscribers a day on the Modern Rogue channel. Knowing that 100k subscribers was seemingly inevitable, Justin pressured Brian into making a bold prediction as to when the milestone would be reached. Brian said "Monday December 5, 2016 at 2pm" and Justin encouraged Chatrealm to yell and laugh at him if that prediction didn't come to be. The next day, Brian hit up his friends (including Justin) to give a shout out to the Modern Rogue to give it a boost. Justin reading the email, feared that the Modern Rogue had lost all of its momentum and was in legitimate danger of not meeting their fake deadline.

Well no need to worry about that! The Modern Rogue reached 100k subscribers on December 2nd! That's pretty neat!

As of the recording of this episode, The Modern Rogue was up to 126,748.


The Patreon is at $1,524. If you want to become a patron, head on over to Patreon.com/NightAttack. ELLIOT KIEF ELLIOT KIEF ELLIOT KIEF ELLIOT KIEF

One Dollar Predictions

When Justin and Brian get together, they like to make $1 bets on random shit. Now that Brian totally predicted that he'll hit 100k subscribers and did remarkably well in the Mikey quiz last week, let's make more dumb bets during the show! WAIT NVM, ALEX JONES MIGHT BE AN ACID HOUSE DJ!


Justin ran across this article about how Alex Jones might have a side career as an acid house musician. He has a ton of DJ equipment in the background of some of his videos so he at least has an interest in the craft.

Brian talked a bit about the feud between Alex Jones and fellow radio host Shannon Burke back in the day. Meanwhile, the Chatrealm came up with some potential DJ names for Alex Jones. Then Brian and Justin did Alex Jones/DJ impressions.

Ok, Let's Bet on Stuff

Brian only has $2 bills so I guess he'll be paying out 2-to-1?

  • Justin says: Alex Jones will be revealed to be an acid house DJ by the end of the year
  • Justin says: Donald Trump will tweet less than 1.5 times tomorrow (December 7, 2016)
  • Brian says: By the end of THIS EPISODE, we'll get 10 photoshops of Justin pissing on a grave (Justin wins Only 4 came in before the show ended. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14)
  • Justin says: The number Bonnie is thinking of is odd (Justin wins)
  • Brian says: There is more than one comment from Karl in the Diamond Time thread (Brian wins)

Diamond Time

If you want to submit your thing for Diamond Time head over to the weekly Diamond Time post on the DiamondClub subreddit. Instructions on how to format your submission can be found in the post!

Movie Draft Chat

  • Sing is a garbage movie that's gonna make a butt-load of money - Brian
  • It looks like Rogue One is gonna open at $175 million
  • The last Wolverine made $132 million - Justin
  • Yeah but Logan is the last Hugh Jackman/Wolverine movie - Brian
  • But the movies have been declining iat box office - Justin
  • Crazier things have happened! - Brian


So our funny joke of saying "Die in a Fire!" isn't all that funny when there's a major fire where dozens of people were killed. Recently, there was a big warehouse fire in Oakland where 30+ people died. Because of this, Brian refrained from saying "Die in a Fire!" at the end of the episode. This idea didn't cross Justin's mind a couple days earlier when he Snapchatted an Oakland fire memorial and then gave a shout out to his sticker website StickersorDIAF.com. Oooooof… that's a bad look.

Brian and the Bizarre Magic gang had a team meeting and realized that Brian can no longer afford to go out and do live magic stage shows. It's just not worth it to disrupt the schedules for Scam School/Modern Rogue/Scam Stuff/the other 14 podcasts he does. That's pretty crazy. He's been a touring magician for like… I dunno 45 years? Brian is really old AMIRITE?! LOL! GOTTEM! But real talk, all this internet shit is going really well for him. That's legitimately awesome.

Hey, we should do a live Night Attack the Thursday before PAX south in San Antonio. Well, there you have it. Justin said we should do it. So it's DEFINITELY happening. Everyone should definitely book flights and hotels because this live show is TOTALLY happening now. GET HYPED! LIVE SHOW IN SAN ANTONIO 100% CONFIRMED. When and where it's definitely happening? Idk, that's some shit you figure out two days before the show. It's absolutely happening. Jk lol. Who knows if that's happening? Check back with Justin and/or Neshcom like a week before PAX South. I mean… I say check with Neshcom because he seems like the dude that Justin would tell to organize a show, but I guarantee you he knows as much as you do about this.

Great Quotes

  • "I wonder if Sting keeps retention stats" - Tensorguy in the chat when Brian was talking about YouTube Analytics
  • "I'm rollin' really hard right now" - either Brian or Justin as Alex Jones
  • "People are funny and I like to laugh" - Justin after the Paul Rudd/Mac and Me videos in the aftershow

Fun Facts

  • Brian went to the liquor store that Alex Jones frequents and got $20 in $2 bills
  • Brian is a fan of Thomas Jefferson


  • Alex Jones
  • Cargill during the dollar bet segment

Preshow Doc


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