Show Notes
Show notes by Leon - Latest version on DCTVpedia
Opening Video
Brian Moved to LA
So Brian has moved to LA for the summer for his "vacation" with his Hacking the System co-star Jason Murphy. You shouldn't waste your time wondering why the stars of a television show moved to LA for the summer. I assure you they're just on "vacation".
In reaction to LA traffic, Brian decided to buy a bike and ride around everywhere in about the same time as it would take to drive. He mentioned that he had ridden 10 miles to a place; apparently a lot of people think that's impressive.
A Self-Made Commercial Pilot Turned YouTuber Threw His Baby
Brian met up with a YouTuber in Salt Lake City. Apparently the dude taught himself to fly a plane and sped through school in order to become a commercial airline pilot in like 4 days. While Brian was at the dude's house, the guy started balancing his baby in the palm of his hand. In a hilarious trick, the guy said "Hey Brian, CATCH!" and threw the baby at Brian. Understandably, Brian was terrified and attempted to save the baby, but the guy had grabbed the baby by its feet, bringing it back to safety. Once Brian realized that the baby wasn't in any danger, he saw the dude and his wife laughing hysterically at Brian's reaction.
The dude's name is Grant Thompson and you can check out his YouTube channel - "The King of Random"
Homeless Dudes, RIGHT?
Brian had been in LA for 48 hours and he had already seen a human doo-doo on a paper plate out in public. Tom joined the panel and explained that in San Francisco, you would just see the doo-doo and in Oakland you would see the guy making the doo-doo.
Justin then mentioned the time when he saw a homeless dude laughing maniacally, jerking off and pissing at the same time. Who knew that was possible?
Patreon
The Patreon is at $2,134. If you want to become a patron, head on over to Patreon.com/NightAttack.
The Merritt Sessions
When Brian got to LA, he took a stroll with Tom down Venice beach and watched some lovely latino boys play handball. During a silence, Tom dropped some serious shit on Brian. Turns out Tom LOVED the Patreon-exclusive Belmont Tapes and… ya know… if Brian and Justin ever wanted to so something like that with… I dunno, Tom maybe… that'd be cool. I mean… I don't wanna force you into anything.
The Fucking Frogpants All-Stars Game
Veronica joins the panel to talk about how fucking rigged the god damn Frogpants All-Stars game was. Brian, Justin, Tom and Veronica were all participants in the games, with Justin and Tom being on different teams and Brian and Veronica being on the same team. After day 1 (aka the day of recording), Brian and Veronica's team had been eliminated and Justin and Tom's teams would face off in the finals in day 2. Spoiler Alert: Justin's team won.
Complaints
- The Doubleclicks counted as one person
- The movies of Don Cheadle are much easier to name than the movies of Dermot Mulroney
Friendly Recommendation
Mailroute
Head on over to Mailroute.net/NightAttack.html for a 15-day free trial.
Don't Get Brody'd
Everybody has stories, some are better at telling them than others. The four hosts will sit in judgement and the stories are being told. When two of the four hosts get bored of the story, the storyteller is Brody'd and kicked off the show. The person who stays interesting for the longest amount of time is declared the winner.
- Peter - He's walking through a park and there's this dog running at him and barking. Brody'd
- April Ness - Her brother's friend is at the airport, he's hungry so he gets some Chili's. He gets on the plane and he's not feeling well and "things start coming out". When everyone gets off the plane an old lady comes up to him and says "I know it was you, boy! I SEEN YA LEAN!" 42 seconds!
- Hammond - He was in LA and he really had to take a dump, so he got a plate. Brody'd
- Ben - He had the sex talk with his dad. He said "We have to talk about masturbation. What do the kids call it these days? Jerkin it? Jackin off? It's cool, it's perfectly normal. But sometimes you need something to help you out." His dad gave him a box and it was filled with hand-drawn Jennifer Anniston porn. 1 minute 18 seconds!
Diamond Time
Usually Justin and Brian pimp some of the Chatrealm's projects that were submitted online, but since this is a live show, they are letting the audience plug their own projects. Here's some things you should check out.
- Corey from Pennsylvannia's little brother who didn't save his brother a seat in the front row.
- The Comic Book Show
- Record Breakers
- University of Advancing Technology
If you want to submit your thing for Diamond Time head over to NightAttack.tv/DiamondTime or Bit.ly/plugmything.
Cold Open Preview
When Justin was in Austin a week earlier, he and Brian recorded some cold opens for Spearmint Nitrate to animate. They recorded 17 Captain Morgan tracks. They previewed one of the tracks with Tom and Veronica acting out what's happening.
Hey… don't tell anyone where you got this… but I have the audio track that they played. Here it is. Be cool, don't ask how I got it and don't tell anyone that you have it. Alright… We good? Good, now scram.