Show Notes
Show notes by Leon - Latest version on the DCTVpedia
Cold Open
Captain Morgan talks about how his friend Jeep Jop broke his legs by kicking a bag of spaghetti.
Power Outage
Just a couple minutes into the show, the video went black, leaving just the chat on the screen. The guys decided to initiate a "Squarespace.com change of plans" and tell ghost stories punctuated by royalty free music.
Vacation Update
Brian and "former" Hacking the System co-host, Jason Murphy, have been on their very secretive "vacation" together in LA for a month now. It's about time they talk about what they've been up to. They revealed that they've enrolled in Vacation Medical School in Space. Justin punctuated their recaps with some awesome royalty-free songs.
Vacation Itinerary
- Listening to "The Martian" on audiobook
- Witnessing vehicular manslaughter and calling 911
Patreon
The Patreon is at $1989 from 1536 patrons. If you want to become a patron, head on over to Patreon.com/NightAttack.
Ask An Asshole
Jason Murphy may have helped out a random stranger who got run over by a car, but he's still a complete asshole (see Rage Select). He's here to give asshole-advice to Chatrealmers who want help.
- Taylor - His dad won't feed him food or take him places unless he starts acting "normal" and cleans his room.
- Brian's Advice - Hey man, that's his artistic right to be weird.
- Jason's Advice - Clean your shit, MOTHERFUCKER!
- Ev - He's working at a retirement home, and he has the urge to just run into the dining hall and scream to scare the shit out of them.
- Justin's Advice - Avoid startling them, you might kill them.
- Brian's Advice - Ehh, if it's a good joke, go for it.
- Jason's Advice - It's easier to get laid if the lady is scared. If you want some of that old pussy, scare the shit out of them and "get some stank on your hang low".
- Jackie - She met a dude online who likes to drink a lot. He will occasionally piss into an empty milk jug while on a Google Hangout.
- Justin's Advice -
- Brian's Advice - Tell that person to watch the video version of this episode and watch the chatroom guess which person they think it is. Everyone knows who it is.
- Jason's Advice - He has a new startup called "Pisstreon". All of his followers will receive a jug of his piss, this guy should join Pisstreon.
- Krunchy - Last year at DragonCon, her purse got peed in. Now she is with a dude that wanted to pee on her, or have her pee on him. She refused, so he just peed IN her. How can she stop attracting urine?
- Justin's Advice - Holy shit! This is super interesting!
- Jason's Advice - Be a lady and say "No no no, buddy. That was all me." Also, if you ever want to pee on, or in a woman, just do it and say "Nope, that was all you."
- Tensorguy from the inside of a beehive - He recently peed in an incredible bathroom, and now every other bathroom seems insufficient. There were mirrors everywhere! Link to photo
- Jason's Advice - He never got around to giving advice.
Friendly Recommendation
Mailroute
Somehow they started talking about how Luigi loves scat and corpse fucking in his mansion, because that has everything to do with spam.
Head on over to Mailroute.net/NightAttack.html for a 15-day free trial.
Alright Seriously, Lets Talk About Peeing On People
The guys can't get past the caller who got peed on. WE NEED TO TALK ABOUT THIS! Krunchy called back in and they dug further into just how this urine-based sexual assault went down.
Hit up Krunchy on Twitter and give her some love for sharing a horrible experience and giving the show one of the best discussions they've ever had.
Guardians of the Galaxy
Guardians of the Galaxy was released and everyone loves it, but Jason doesn't like it as much as everyone else likes it. Before you track him down and murder him, Jason still really liked the movie, just not as much as everyone else seems to.
Diamond Time
- CO Smiles
- An IndieGoGo that ended a long time ago and came nowhere near its goal
- Texture Pop Gaming
- Skyway Traffic
If you want to submit your thing for Diamond Time head over to the Diamond Club Subreddit and submit your thing. Just be sure to include "[diamondtime]" in the submission title.
Great Quotes
- "Over." - Brian, Justin and Jason
- "You're gonna put a punchline on top of 'I'm gonna adopt a child and throw it away'? That's the funniest thing you could do with a child!" - Justin
- "How many gallons can your vagina hold?" - Jason
- "I'm Luigi. I love corpse fucking." - Brian during the Mailroute Ad
- "I just want to talk about people who pee on other people, I'm not gonna lie." - Brian
- "Does he pee in those tacos too?" - Jason
- "Thank you to the guy that pissed in one of our listener's vaginas." - Justin
Fun Facts
- Justin found a ton of royalty-free music thanks to Ashley and he worked a ton of it into the show.
- During the previous few weeks, Brian and Justin had been trying to work out a solution which would eliminate the Skype audio ducking, allowing them to talk at the same time without one of them being completely drowned out. Their efforts so far had been for naught, and they decided to go the CB radio route by saying "Over" when they were done talking.
Characters Featured
- Pisstini