Show Notes
Cold Open
None
Ed Water
Since things are going to get a bit weird with Brian being on "vacation", during the preshow, the guys decided to set up a system in which Brandt can switch the show. Of course, since this is all new to Brandt, some things were a little wonky. Brian compared this situation to one in which he was the manager of a Chick-Fil-A and he had just hired a new employee named Eduardo. Except, Brian mispronounced his name as "Ed Water". This lead to a lovely new bit in which Brian and Justin yell at Ed Water to do things.
Vacation Plans
When Brian is out in LA for "vacation", he, Penny, Justin and Andrew are planning to take a tour of the SpaceX facility in Hawthorne, CA. Turns out there is a Diamond Clubber who is a SpaceX employee. He also took a picture of himself flashing the Diamond Club symbol inside the Dragon V2 capsule.
Troll-bama
So Obama is entering his last two years in office, Justin argues that since no president is ever able to get anything done in their last two years, Obama should just start fucking with people. Justin's suggestion is for Obama to tweet out "I'm banning guns. #GetIt". Then later when he holds a press conference about this massive new policy he simply steps up to the podium and says "Suck" and asks for questions.
Brian suggested that Obama set up a Twitch account and start streaming playthroughs. Head over to Twitch.tv/imdaprezz.
Patreon
The Patreon is at $2183. If you want to become a patron, head on over to Patreon.com/NightAttack.
MikeTV is Becoming a Texan
MikeTV just moved to Austin from Los Angeles and he's totally gonna get guns and shoot the Deer Police.
Diamond Club Go Game
Justin is in Austin to do a GoGame for a Chatrealmer. Justin created a new "newsie" character for this game and asked Chatrealm to write some lines for this character. Check out some of the submissions on the Diamond Club subreddit.
Unity Beer Ceremony
Inspired by the previous couple episodes' discussion of "unity sand" and because they hit $2100 on Patreon, Brian and Justin performed a unity beer ceremony in which they both poured old, dirty bottle caps into a glass, followed by mixing both of their beers in the same glass, and finally they drank the disgusting mixture. It was beautiful.
MikeTV's Instant Covers
MikeTV is apparently known for improvising covers of songs he's never heard before. First, he came up with a song about Fermat's Last Theorem, then he covered Service is Selling. Finally he teamed up with Brian, Justin and Bonnie to perform covers of IMDABES and Rifle Burs. To close out the episode, MikeTV performed the "My Dick" version of his song "I Hate Everyone".
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Diamond Time
If you want to submit your thing for Diamond Time head over to NightAttack.tv/DiamondTime or Bit.ly/plugmything.
Great Quotes
- "Nothing's gonna change, everybody… aside from the show being different and weirder and not what you wanted and you don't like it and you're not gonna donate to the Patreon…" - Justin
- "Eat my mother's nuts!" - Justin reacting to the Patreon total
- "My dick is hollow and made of glass." - Justin